The Fission Olympic Gold Medal leader is….


13 elite athletes have been training for 6 months to nearly 5 years for this moment..the pain,  the glory, the thrill of victory or the agony of defeat..The Fission Olympics

Competitions were either speed or max reps and we don't award Medals for whims that complete  a mere 100 meters in running or swimming.  This was a true test of wills and the thrills and agony provailed during with heat winners but ultimately with one golden man. You see the pax above..what's your predication.  

Warmo-rama – run and the standard stuff y'all familiar with

The Thang

100 Meter Sprint – Gold winner The Geek; Silver Landline; Bronze Ludi

Max Clap – push ups – Gold winner Macbeth; Sliver Geek, Bronze Primo

Crabwalk – Gold winner Kid Rock; Silver Hollywood; Bronze Hatrick

Bear Crawl – Gold winner Hollywood; Sillver Mayhem; Bronze Chinny

Broad Jump – Gold winner The Geek; Silver Metallica; Bronze Landline

Trash talker – Gold winner Kid Rock; Sliver Kid Rock; Bronze Kid Rock

Plank – Gold winnerThe Pax

Backward Run – Gold winner The Geek; Silver Primo, Bronze Landline

Uneven Bars – Gold winner Metallica; Silver Thug, Bronze Chinny

Biggest no show – Gold winner – Special Sauce

Synchonzed beatdown – Gold winners The Geek/Landline; Sliver: Primo/Mayhem; Bronze: Metallica/Hollywood

Moleskin:

Despite the concern of community uprising, the opening ceremony got off without a hitch and Gisselle's catwalk was out done by Ludi's appearance and Special Sauces No show

The raw emotion of participants and their countrymen was apparent as the competion was intense and fierce

Pax left it all on the course

Highlights include:

Kid Rock impersonated the Kenyans initimitidation and box in of Mo Farrah by using his mouth and getting after the Mo Farrahesque Geek

The Geek would not be denied though and a hugh congratulations to the The Geek, the most decorated Fission Olympian in history.

If you're not first, you are last, BUT  on  the podium with the Geek was Landline and Mayhem

Ryan Lochete – apologizing for coming in 5th, embarrassing RIO and himself by overdrinking and claiming to be held at gunpoint when all he really needed to do was take a leak so bad that he had a temper tantrum

Enough banter. Thanks, Bob Costas