Six of greater northwest Charlotte proper’s finest made it out on a balmy 62 degree winter day to compete in the Cobalt Australian Open. Hilarity then ensured. What follows is the 411 on just how it all went down, but you didn’t hear any of this from me.
Warm-o-Rama
Jump rope in place (sans jump rope), high knees, butt kicks, karaoke x 2, backwards run, SSH, TS, Windmill and Cotton freakin’ cherry pickers
The Thang
Pax has demonstrated incredible fortitude when facing various elements of heat, cold, as well as dehydration. However, a firm line is drawn when it comes to the elements of moisture. Head linesman/Q deemed the tennis courts to be unplayable for purposes of the Cobalt Australian Open, so an alternate audible was called.
Mosey towards gazebo
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10 squats I/C along the way
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10 CDD I/C further along the way
Arrive at the Gazebo, Beyond Thunderdome
Timed event with 20 seconds of exercise followed by a 10 second rest between exercises. Benevolent 1 minute rest offered that at the end of each set. Six exercises in each set, which were aided with the use of picnic tables. Exercises included:
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Decline mercans
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1-leg step up (left leg)
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Incline mercans
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1-leg step up (right leg)
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Dips
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2-leg step up (both legs)
Four sets in total. Sets 2, 3 and 4 looked and felt a lot like Set 1
Mosey on back to the parking lot.
Mary
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~90 second plank (it was still moist out)
Moleskine
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Natty’s joining the early morning tai chi group during his visit to San Francisco was akin to Godzilla’s invasion of Tokyo (Natty-san)
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Two weeks away from F3 may cause a malady commonly referred to as "ass atrophy"
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We perforated the space time continuum during the first timed exercise, as this seemed to last a whole lot longer than the allotted 20 seconds. Upon further review, it may just have been timer user error
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All this negative energy makes Q stronger
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There is a movie called Enigma that details the efforts to decode communications from Nazi Germany that comes highly recommended. The plot has nothing at all to do with enemas (the question was asked)
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Certain workouts have no real relation to the subject referenced in the pre-blast (this applies to most of Q’s workouts, quite frankly). This is the most egregious in recent memory as the Gazebo audible had absolutely nothing to do with the Australian Open, mate.
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Oktoberfest's prior work experiences involved being the "cue person" during the process of taking medical photos to document bed sores. He's seen some things
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New F3 monikers coming soon: "Way-Am" and "Richard Cranium"
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Oktoberfest planning to move to Texas to build a wall. It sounded like a very compelling idea to the Pax
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Great work on the audible men!