“I think I just took off your winky,” he said demurely.



WARM-O-RAMA

  • 25 Goose-Steps IC (arms and legs straight, front-to-back instead of side-to-side like side straddle hops).
  • 25 Pirate Ships IC (Bend over 90 degrees, arms wide, swing torso and arms back and forth like the carnival ride.)
  • 20 Girl Fights IC (arms swinging fast in a big arc).  
  • 20 Bobby Hurleys OYO (no three-pointers were scored).
  • 10 Abe Vigodas (windmills in slo-mo)

THE THANG

  • Mosey to Railing: At Oakhurst and Bailey.
  • 20 Super-Slow Triceps Dips in cadence
  • 20 One-Arm Australian Pull-Ups in cadence each arm (Note: this is a super-groovy exercise to add to your next Q-tine, kids! You can tell by the grumblechatter that everybody loves it!)
  • 100% Sprint Up the Hill (“sprint” is a relative term, as demonstrated by the many who flew by me like I was standing still).
  • 10 Super-Slow Merkins IC
  • 20 Low Dollys IC (just to catch our breath)
  • Mosey Back to Base Camp (The Pax were getting nervous about the fate of our abandoned kettlebells, but it turns out they’re more independent than we gave them credit for. That’s because we’re good parents.)
  • 10 Cobra Kai Killers (one-legged squats with arms in Crane Kick position.) None of the karate kids present executed the kick at the end so, yet again, we lost the All-Valley Karate Tournament to the Cobra Kai dojo. Curse you, Johnny!
  • Arm-O-Rama OYO (10 Full Curls/10 Shoulder Presses/10 Skull Crushers). Repeato until walking all the way around the lot.
  • 20 Golfzillas (nickname of long-drive champ Jason Zuback) Kettlebell swings from side to side in front of body. Lots of modifies on this one due to it's dubious effect on the lower back.

Partner up

  • 20 Teabag Partner Leg Throwdowns OYO
  • Partner 1 does AFLACs (Duck Walk with Kettlebell for ) while Partner 2 does Straight Arm Kettlebell Sit-Up
  • Double-Dog Dare Partner 1 does 25 Double-Bell Rows OYO while Partner 2 does Upward Facing Dog (feet and palms only, head up). Switch roles, hit replay.

MARY

  • 20 Hot Potatoes OYO (transfer sit-ups with hooked legs, passing bell back and forth)
  • 20 Little Baby Flutter Crunch Presses in cadence
  • 25 Sit and Press IC (situps with kettlebell press at top)
  • 20 Side Raises each side
  • 20 Lying Toe-Touch Crunches (legs in the air) IC
  • 20 Mason Twist with Kettlebell
  • 10 Kettlebell Deck Squats OYO (standing up, bell to chest, lay down, bell over head, stand up)
    It seems a very small minority of the attendees actually attempted this exercise, but I cannot be dissuaded.

Recover Recover


MOLESKINE:
11 men bravely showed their faces in the eerie blue-white glow of the artificial suns of 131 Main, despite the pre-blast promise of abominable abdominals. But their man-pots called the kettlebells black and rose to the occasion (with the notable exception of the last exercise).

The Force notified me that he took off my winky while we had our legs locked ever so tenderly for the Hot Potato. Fortunately for all of us, he was referring to my exercise cheat sheet, which I had cleverly, but not-so-securely rubber-banded to my glove. The winky was restored and the games resumed.

I think I was a little less popular after the double-recover, which is always the sign of a tough workout. Thanks, gents, for putting up with my nonsense. I do love to mix it up a bit. Thanks also to Metallica for the Quopportunity!