When the calendar was still empty at 4 PM yesterday, YHC decided to step up to avoid playing with little rocks and aligning my nipples for 8-count exercises. At 0445, I decided a t-shirt was not practical over a compression shirt and upped my gear game with a hoodie. At 0515, I stepped outside and knew I had made the right call. At 0530, I regretted my decision to Q as I shivered in the HT parking lot with 5 other men who posted to see what I would come up with to keep them warm.

We started with a warm-up lap around the HT parking lot. I’m not sure how warm we got, but we did manage to get in some side shuffles, butt kickers, high knees and quadrophelia along with the mosey. We came to a stop in the center of the parking lot where YHC explained the importance of a good backblast — so that others Qs could plagiarize them.

Stealing from 9-Lives, we radiated out from the center of the lot to 12 points on our square-shaped clock. At each stop we would do several reps of an exercise, then run back to the center for one half-ass burpee. Rinse and repeat with different exercises at each of the 12 stations.

• SSH
• IST
• Slow Squats
• Apollo Ohno
• Muhammad Ali
• People’s Chair w/ Wonderbra
• CDD
• Praying Mantis
• Makhtar N’Diaye
• Low Flutter
• Merkins
• American Hammer

For most sets, YHC was determined to get in 15 reps. The exception was the merkins which stopped at 10, but to make up for it, we stopped at a buggy return (yes, I call them buggies) for optional AMRAP pull-ups. YHC was momentarily confused that we had only used 30 minutes despite moving a full 60 minutes around our clock until Greyhound pointed out that 9-Lives does more reps at each station.

Well, more reps it is then! When we were at the 6 o’clock station, Fast Pitch seemed to be a little too eager to run further so we ran across the street to the urgent care building. YHC wanted to get in some Suzanne Sommers, but there was more salt on the lot than in a bag of Salt & Vinegar chips. Instead, we did some more People’s Chair with an Air Press, touching hands to wall over our head. Next we ran to some nearby picnic tables for Dips, including some Top Shelf Dips, where we put our feet up on the seat across from us. #ouch

With Bagboy eyeing the time like a teenage boy peering through a peep hole into the women’s locker room, we ran from corner to corner with a burpee at each stop (plus the aforementioned Jane Fondas at the first corner). At 0614 we were still 100 yards from the cars forcing a sprint to the start. Following one last burpee for good measure, Bagboy ditched us to take a shower with the Water Wings boys (as we learned at coffeeteria). We prayed it out and reassembled at Dunkin’ for a warm drink in a warm chair.

Yosemite, Jersey Boy and Greyhound joined YHC for story time where we were eventually joined by Caesar, Holiday and WMD. The camaraderie made the previous 45 minutes in 18-degrees worth it. Here, here!