18 hard-chargers sallied out in near-perfect, humid gloominess for the Q v. Q Elite 8 "Vanquisher" edition where Turnpike and Gnarly Goat teed up a true snotwoggle-fest that saw something old, something new, something "borrowed" and something blue. Here be ye olde thang as near as recallable:
Gnarly Goat gathered in the pax for a proper disclamation, then launched into a brief CoP that was sullied by extreme flatulence in the NW quadrant. Aside from the flatulence, the CoP included
10 x Americans
20 x ssh
10 x windmill
run away from the cloud
turn over to Turnpike
Turnpike broke us into three teams and moseyed us around for a round of team picnic table lifting x 20
Oh look, there seems to be a building block obstacle course conveniently located in the parking lot!
Pax partner up. Wheelbarrow down, up and over the block obstacles approximately 40 yards.
Flapjack. Repeato.
American timer goes off! 10 x Americans.
turnover to Gnarly Goat
Previous American timer was fake news. Do it again.
Well, we're at the blocks… let's do some Block Webbs 1:4 ratio up to 5:20
Circle up for block work:
10 x curls for girls
10 x lawn mower pulls each arm
10 x bent over rows
10 x skull crushers
10 x little baby crunches
mobility moment
turnover to Turnpike
Over to wall for… hmm… what do we call this…??… hmm… People's Chair-a-Choo Choo? Pass me a leg? Pull up a chair and walk the plank? This is one where you just had to be there.
Mosey down to the dike for some "dam" 'Mericans. (see what I did there?)
Mosey to the big balls for some big ball jump burpees
Parking lot sprints with shuffles, quadraphilia, etc.
10 x Americans
turnover to Goat
cack-a-lack-a choo choo for 40 yards
more block work (masonry twists, chest presses, etc)
mobility moment
15 x lbc
15 x Americans
ARM CIRCLES!!
Mosey back to launch pad
Turnpike leads 30 secs heels to Heaven amrap
FIN
Vanquish-skin:
'Twas a true smoke-fest this morning as the pax suffered through elite 8 q's Goat and Turnpike.
Turnpike seized the inititative early by establishing his ownership of today's 'Merican timer, thus removing Goat's well-known center of graity. This is tactical brilliance on the level of Sun Tzu and Helmuth von Moltke. He followed that by taking us to a well-laid obstacle course that clearly had taken some time to create. Another win for the toll road man. Of course if we are to study the masters of war, we must also study Clauswitz, who warned against fighting beyond the point of culmination. The battle seemed to belong to Turnpike until he decided – perhaps ill-advisedly – to head for the big balls for burpees. Was this Turnpike's bridge too far? Does Waterloo rhyme with BigBallBurpees? Yes it does. At this point Goat sensed the battle was not quite over, and he commenced a campaign of serious pandering, mobility moments and even employed the nuclear option of "Arm Circles" which were encouraged by the ever-hawkish Stray.
Folks, this engagement will be studied by F3 scholars for generations to come. It was a true classic in which everyone was ultimately a winner due to serious snotwoggling, tbq'ing and general pain-ish-ness. Participation trophies were earned by all. But let's face it…. any Q that could've convinced that ice cream man to open his truck for the pax would've won with 100% of the vote.