Q v. Q Elite 8: Gnarly Goat v. Turnpike


18 hard-chargers sallied out in near-perfect, humid gloominess for the Q v. Q Elite 8 "Vanquisher" edition where Turnpike and Gnarly Goat teed up a true snotwoggle-fest that saw something old, something new, something "borrowed" and something blue.  Here be ye olde thang as near as recallable:

Gnarly Goat gathered in the pax for a proper disclamation, then launched into a brief CoP that was sullied by extreme flatulence in the NW quadrant.  Aside from the flatulence, the CoP included 

10 x Americans

20 x ssh

10 x windmill

run away from the cloud

turn over to Turnpike

Turnpike broke us into three teams and moseyed us around for a round of team picnic table lifting x 20

Oh look, there seems to be a building block obstacle course conveniently located in the parking lot!

Pax partner up.  Wheelbarrow down, up and over the block obstacles approximately 40 yards.

Flapjack.  Repeato.

American timer goes off!  10 x Americans.

turnover to Gnarly Goat

Previous American timer was fake news.  Do it again.

Well, we're at the blocks… let's do some Block Webbs 1:4 ratio up to 5:20

Circle up for block work:  

10 x curls for girls

10 x lawn mower pulls each arm

10 x bent over rows

10 x skull crushers

10 x little baby crunches

mobility moment

turnover to Turnpike

Over to wall for… hmm… what do we call this…??… hmm… People's Chair-a-Choo Choo?  Pass me a leg?  Pull up a chair and walk the plank?  This is one where you just had to be there.

Mosey down to the dike for some "dam" 'Mericans.  (see what I did there?)

Mosey to the big balls for some big ball jump burpees

Parking lot sprints with shuffles, quadraphilia, etc.

10 x Americans

turnover to Goat

cack-a-lack-a choo choo for 40 yards

more block work (masonry twists, chest presses, etc)

mobility moment

15 x lbc

15 x Americans

ARM CIRCLES!!

Mosey back to launch pad

Turnpike leads 30 secs heels to Heaven amrap

FIN

Vanquish-skin:

'Twas a true smoke-fest this morning as the pax suffered through elite 8 q's  Goat and Turnpike.  

Turnpike seized the inititative early by establishing his ownership of today's 'Merican timer, thus  removing Goat's well-known center of graity.  This is tactical brilliance on the level of Sun Tzu and Helmuth von Moltke.  He followed that by taking us to a well-laid obstacle course that clearly had taken some time to create.  Another win for the toll road man.  Of course if we are to study the masters of war, we must also study Clauswitz, who warned against fighting beyond the point of culmination.  The battle seemed to belong to Turnpike until he decided – perhaps ill-advisedly – to head for the big balls for burpees.  Was this Turnpike's bridge too far?  Does Waterloo rhyme with BigBallBurpees?  Yes it does.  At this point Goat sensed the battle was not quite over, and he commenced a campaign of serious pandering, mobility moments and  even employed the nuclear option of "Arm Circles" which were encouraged by the ever-hawkish Stray.  

Folks, this engagement will be studied by F3 scholars for generations to come.  It was a true classic in which everyone was ultimately a winner due to serious snotwoggling, tbq'ing and general pain-ish-ness.  Participation trophies were earned by all.  But let's face it…. any Q that could've convinced that ice cream man to open his truck for the pax would've won with 100% of the vote.